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Why You Do The Shit You Do. #002

Harsh truth alert: The journey to Taking Back Your Life begins with introspection. Understanding you.

What makes you tick?

What pisses you off? What motivates you?

What scares you? What inspires you?

Why you’ve made the choices you’ve made in your life.

Why you are where you are.

Why your relationships are great, or why they suck.

Why you have the job or the business you have.

Whether or not you’re happy, and why.

Every little nook and cranny in your life boils down to 6 things.

And these 6 things, the same 6 things every human being has, are called


Do you ever feel like you react to your life more than you're proactive?

Like you're on auto-pilot?

Like you’re always putting out fires in your life?

If you struggle with anxiety, boundaries, money management, poor relationships, weight loss, or any other big problem out there. Are there not a million resources, books, classes, coaches, mentors, teachers, medications, programs or even videos that can and would help you make some progress and at the least reduce the problem?

YES! There are.

And yet, you, me and millions upon millions of us still hang on to our “problem” or “problems” because they serve us. They meet our needs. And giving up that “problem” would mean we would have to find new ways to meet those needs.

That's why I put together this podcast episode. To help you get some understanding of you and your needs. To help you understand why you do the shit you do(or don't do).

If you're anything like me, when I first learned of these needs and started putting the pieces together as to how I had been living my life (meeting my needs) in ways that took me further and further away from what I truly wanted my life to look like, it made me angry.

But the good news is when you get a solid understanding of you and the people you love, life makes so much more sense.

You'll be in a position of power to start meeting those needs in ways that move you towards your goals and a life you can get excited about instead of feeling like you're just going through the motions.

On this episode I dig into the question:

What are the 6 HUMAN NEEDS and how do they play out in your life?

  • Maybe you stay in crappy relationships longer than you'd like to.

  • Maybe you procrastinate or make excuses.

  • Maybe you steer clear of crowds and busy places.

  • Maybe you prefer being the center of attention.

  • Maybe you love trying new things.

  • Maybe you prefer routine and predictability.

  • Maybe you love/hate learning new things.

Understanding ourselves, and our loved ones is the key to happiness.

So take some time today to really get to know yourself. Figure out how the 6 needs play a role in your life choices.

Set a goal to be able to know EXACTLY what need you, or someone you love, is meeting when they or you say or do something.

This week’s episode breaks down each need for you. I want you to have real clarity as to who you are and why you do (or don't do) the things you do.

I also give you some tips on how to meet your needs in healthy productive ways (and spot it when you are meeting them in not so great ways so you can pivot).

I know how confusing all of this can be… so I want you to know you’re not alone. I have been where you are now. In the beginning stages of learning how I ticked.

Once I did, my life changed. And so can yours.

So scroll on up the page, pop this episode into your eardrums and let me know if you can relate!

The Biggest Takeaways from this Episode:

  • Certainty-The need to feel safe and comfortable and avoid pain of any kind.

  • Variety/Uncertainty-The need for physical and mental stimulation

  • Significance-unique, special, important, valued, appreciated. To be worthy of attention.

  • Love/Connection which is pretty obvious-we all want to feel connected to other human beings

  • Growth-The need to develop and expand physically, intellectually, emotionally and spiritually

  • Contribution-The need to be part of something or to give to something bigger than one’s self.

We don’t do ANYTHING that doesn’t meet at least one need. Even if we have to meet it in a negative way.

There are a million ways to meet our needs.

The question is, are you, and the people in your life meeting those needs in positive, neutral or negative ways?

The most common ways we meet our needs are usually, unfortunately, the not so great ways because they’re easy or fun.


Imagine how your life could be if you truly understood yourself and the people in your life better.

At the end of this episode I tell you how self-pity is meeting three or more of your needs and in not so great ways. I also tell you the ONLY reliable way to replace a bad habit that actually sticks.

Resources Mentioned in This Episode:

I hope you find this episode packed with value and resources that will help you as you do the hard work to build the life you deserve!

Wishing you all the best in your journey to TAKE BACK YOUR LIFE!!

A Little Note From Me

Thank you so very much for tuning into the show!

I know there are a TON of podcasts you could be listening to today, but you chose mine and I am forever grateful for that!

I’d love for you to subscribe to my podcast! I don’t want you to miss an episode. I’m going to be including a series of episodes to the mix that are slam dunks to help you get the most traction in your life and if you’re not subscribed there’s a good chance you’ll miss out on those. Click here to subscribe in iTunes!

Now if you are feeling extra contributory, I would be really grateful if you could leave me a review over on iTunes too. Those reviews not only help other people find my podcast, they also give me great feedback as to what you like, don't like and what you would like to hear about on the podcast. They also let me know you are getting value and enjoying the podcast, which is my goal each week. Let me know your favorite topics I discuss on the podcast. Thanks so much!

Your review is not only paramount in helping others discover the show, but I also read each and every submission personally...and they mean the world to me.

So thank you in advance!

Finally, do you have questions about today’s episode or have suggestions for something you would like me to talk about on the podcast?

Drop me an email at and let me know.

That’s the best way for me to help clear up any confusion or answer any questions and to ensure I am incorporating everything you need to help you bridge the gap from where you are and where you want to be and start the process towards taking back your life!!



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